The Freshman Twenty

We all know about the awful freshman twenty.
Which has replaced the freshman fifteen for like years now.

The freshman twenty hangs over every freshman's head.
Whether you want to admit it or not - it probably happened to you.
And around the magic number of twenty, you started to freak out.

Wait, I think we're talking about 2 different things.
You are probably thinking of gaining weight - right?!
Ohh. My bad. I'm actually talking about DATING.

You heard me. I'm talking about the freshman twenty
in regards to how many DAYS girls and guys feel like
they have from when college starts until they should
meet and start dating The One.

So before we talk more about the freshman twenty,
we need to talk about what happened to the freshman fifteen.

.....................................................................................................
Commitment. Options. Opportunities. Threats.

Each day there are more and more opportunities that present themselves to us as being the best one. You walk into a coffee shop and there are many different flavors. But then you see the manager's choice blend, the new blend, and the customer's favorite blend; all three options are the best to someone, so which one do you pick? You are 17 years old and looking at colleges. Each one you visit and look into gives you the same pitch about being the place for you to attend.

Dating is not much different.

Boys: You look at the girls in the cafeteria and you always think that the next one to walk past your table is prettier, more spiritual, smarter, or more likely to earn millions than the girl that is sitting next to you.

Girls: You are browsing through various guys' twitter accounts and think that the next one you go to is going to be funnier, more godly, handsomer, or more likely to score the winning touchdown at Saturday's game than the last boy.

There are too many options. This leads to a lack of commitment from boys and girls. So the freshman fifteen is simply not enough time to pick the one. This is one reason why society has been forced to add almost an entire week to the process.

There are also more opportunities that await you once you reach college. There are opportunities to be involved in drama, sports teams, the school newspaper, and other clubs. Well each opportunity unlocks a new batch of girls and guys to meet and get to know before settling down on the one. There are simply too many events to attend and people to meet in fifteen days; therefore, twenty days is required in order to determine if he or she has been found.

Needless to say, the one is becoming harder to locate and date within fifteen to twenty days because of all these threats. Kids these days are born with commitment issues. No one ever has to commit to anything because there is always something new and more exciting that is coming out soon or just around the corner. And if you do decide to commit to something, there is no shame in abandoning the person a few weeks into the relationship when things get rocky because there is someone out there that is sure to be more agreeable.

The problem is that freshman twenty is a real feeling that young people experience because everyone (or a good majority of everyone) wants to tell their children that mommy and daddy met the first __(event,class,week)__ of college. So there are hunters out there, but now we have all of these variables in the mix which lead many people to remain single past the freshman twenty deadline.

So in the twenty-first century, American college students have officially moved out of the freshman fifteen and into the freshman twenty. How long will this last?! That my friends, is the question. Can you commit to the one in the first twenty days of freshman year? That is the answer. [note: answers may vary]

And once you commit to the one - this is what happens next.

Note: If you start college while dating your high school sweetheart, the freshman twenty will be a time period where you completely pick apart your relationship and determine your level of commitment and seriousness because the days are ticking and your true and only one may be whisked away by another boy or girl.

relaunch coming soon

This little blog will be relaunched soon :) It will be epic. New style. New ideas. Same ole me.
Check back next week to see the new blog!

Rwanda Update: One week left!

Hi friends! Here is my most recent update! Enjoy :)

It has been a whirlwind of a week for me! My mom was able to update everyone on the car accident I was involved in Monday morning. I greatly appreciate all of your prayers! I am doing much better today after resting for the last two days. My neck and shoulder are still stiff and sore and I do have occasional headaches but nothing serious so I am beyond thankful for that. God definitely had his hand over me and the others in the accident because no one was seriously injured and the accident had the potential to be very bad. I am also reminded how God has blessed me with great people around me, near and far, to help me through the last few days! Thank you again for all your prayers. They mean the world to me!

The truck that rear-ended our car sending us into the car in front of us! And yes the amount of stuff in this truck is illegal because he never had a shot at stopping!

Okay on to the happy stuff! I spent a fantastic weekend in Gesinyi with Pangras and his family. He has four children, three boys and one girl, and I can honestly say that they are family to me now. Noheli is the oldest and he works for ALARM in Kigali so he became my travel companion and big brother over the weekend. Saturday I had the honor of meeting Celestin and Pangras’ mother. She is the mother and grandmother of some of my dearest Rwandan friends and family! She was such a humble and amazing woman. She wants me to learn Kinyarwanda because she is too old to learn English! We had a great hour together! Below is a picture of me and Mama J

Gesinyi is in the western part of the country and it definitely brings a new meaning to “Rwanda: Land of 1000 hills!” It is absolutely gorgeous and breathtaking as you wind in and out of the hills. I was able to spend the rest of the day out in Gesinyi with Noheli and Danny (the youngest in the family). They took me to Lake Kivu (picture below), the market, and their favorite local restaurant where we spent the afternoon and evening with many of their friends! I met so many wonderful people. It was so great to just get away and relax for the weekend and enjoy the beauty of the land and the people J

Sunday morning Pangras took me on an hour ride on dirt roads and through the hills to his church. There are many different sister churches that have all stemmed from the main church. We visited a sister church on Saturday but attended church at the main church. There are about 1000 members of this church alone. It was a worship service so it was about 4 hours of singing! It was so amazing to hear a thousand voices filling the thousand hills of Rwanda. We sang and danced for hours together! We enjoyed a wonderful meal with Pangras and his family after church, and then we made the hour ride back down all of the hills to the bus station where Noheli and I took the bus back to Kigali. Below are pictures of the church with Pangras and some of his family and hills around Lake Kivu!

I can’t believe I have less than a week left here! The teachers and the girls are so amazing and I can’t believe that I have been able to spend a month here teaching and loving them. They keep telling me that I need to move here so I can teach with them all the time. In the pictures below: Amani the English teacher showing off his style! Silvey (French teacher), me, and Noa (Biology and Chemistry teacher)! And then me and Claire (the Kinyarwanda and Swahili teacher)! These are just some of the teachers J

Thanks again for all of your prayers! I can’t believe how amazing this opportunity is and how blessed I am to be enjoying God’s creation and people here in Rwanda. I want to share a Bible verse that I came across during my devotions this past week. It is a good reminder to me about why I’m here and that my flesh will get tired but God will always provide me with strength when I am doing His work!

Galatians 6:9-10

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at a proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”

And I will close with another quote that comes from a song I heard while I was here. I love this song because it reminds me over and over again that my hands and my heart are to serve God in everything I do because I have given my life to Him!
 “Two hands. One heart. One life to offer you.”

I hope you are all doing well J Thanks for all your thoughts, prayers, and support that you each continue to give me! I look forward to seeing all of you when I return home in a week.

God Bless,

Uwitonze Keza Kelsey

This is Maja! She’s my roommate and dear friend who I’ve been staying and teaching with at IWE J

Rwanda Update: Half way

This update was from last week:

Hello everyone!

Well, I have reached my halfway point in this trip. Every single day I wake up and thank God for this opportunity because it truly has been life changing. He has blessed with a wonderful roommate, housekeeper, friends and new family! Everyone here has been loving on me just as much as I am loving on them. I can honestly say that I have a Rwandan family now J

I continue to be amazed at how quickly the teachers and girls are picking up English. Before I arrived, Maja (my roommate) informed me that most of the teachers never spoke English. Today I can officially say that all of them can speak and understand English incredibly well. They are still learning each and every day but they are smiling and hopeful because of their new English skills. They soak up everything Maja and I can give them in a day and we go home completely exhausted. Yesterday, one of the teachers, Silivia, took me to get my nails done at a local salon. I was able to get a full manicure and pedicure for less than $2! She has been the most timid with her English but held an awesome conversation with me all afternoon. We are very close in age so it is nice for her to have me around! We’ve become very close in the last two weeks! The teachers have been wonderful to me and today they informed me that they will cry very hard when I have to leave them. They say that they don’t know what they will do at IWE without Maja and me when we leave. I really have made some amazing friends here and look forward to joining many of the teachers for dinner at their homes in the upcoming week!

The girls are also learning a lot of English. However, it is common in many African cultures that when someone asks you if you understand something that you rely yes because you want to please the person. It can become very frustrating as a teacher who doesn’t speak their language because sometimes I never know if they really understand a word, phrase or concept because they tell me they do but then cannot use the words or perform the task. One of our main goals has been giving the girls success experiences in order to boost their confidence when speaking English. Maja and I have been bringing fun games and songs into the classroom to teach them more English words and vocabulary. The girls are definitely much bolder with their English than ever before! Many of them can even hold lengthy conversations with me throughout the day. They have also been teaching me a lot about their culture! I am able to hold small conversations in Kinyarwanda and can even sing a few songs. They are very impressed!

I am looking forward to a long three day weekend in the North Western past of Rwanda this upcoming weekend! I will spend time with some family friends in Gisenyi near Lake Kiva. Celestin is the president of ALARM Inc., the organization that runs IWE and who I am here with, and I will be staying at the home of his brother, Pangress, this weekend. My parents and brother met Pangress back in 2005 when they were here so I am excited to meet him as well! Lake Kiva is a huge tourist spot in Rwanda and I’ve heard that it is just beautiful! Many of the teachers from IWE were born out in Gisenyi and have told me many wonderful things about the area.

Please, continue to pray for strength and wisdom as I move into the last two weeks of my adventure here in Rwanda. I’ve had some trouble sleeping at night because even though it is the dry season it still rains periodically. The rain storms here are very intense, and trying to sleep in a house with a tin roof in the middle of a monsoon is pretty much impossible! And if the rain isn’t keeping me up, the crows are! They are so incredibly loud on the roof and they scare me to death sometimes. So please pray that I will get some much needed rest! Also pray for safety as I travel a lot in the next few days. Finally, pray that God will continue to bless IWE and that the teachers will continue to change the lives of these girls everyday! I truly love every minute of it and am so blessed to see God working in the lives of the teachers and students at IWE.

Thank you all for the support, love and prayers!

Kelsey (Uwitonze Keza)

I wrote this quote on my journal so I see it every day and wanted to share it with you all. It has reminded me every single day that God is my strength and I’m here to be His hands and feet!

“When I fail to pray, the best I can do is the best I can do. I forfeit my spiritual potential. But when I pray, the best I can do is no longer the best I can do. The best I can do is the best God can do.”

Rwanda Update!

Hi everyone!

I am sorry that it has taken this long to actually write to you but my motto here tends to be “This is Africa!” And for those of you who are unfamiliar with that motto, it means anything can happen at any point and you just have to go with it. Time and material aspects do not run this culture – the people do! I attempted to get on the internet at a local hotel earlier this week a few times but was informed that the internet throughout the entire country is down. I’m not sure how that is possible, but “This is Africa!” I’m going to make this update as detailed as possible since I don’t know when I’ll be able to send another one and I want all of you to know what is going on in my life here in Rwanda.

 

(Me outside my African house in Rwamagana)

I landed in Kigali and met ALARM’s country representative, Benjamin, at the airport Saturday night. I later met up with my roommate and fellow teacher, Maja, and her daughter, Charissa. Maja has been teaching at IWE (Institute of Women’s Excellence) for a month now and I am living with her near the school. Charissa has been in Rwanda for almost 3 years because she was involved in the Peace Corps and then was offered a teaching job at a school in Kigali but she’s heading back to America for good next week. It was great to be in Kigali with them because they know the lay of the land. Sunday I was able to go to church with Benjamin at a local school that trains teachers. Then Charissa showed me around Kigali. We walked around so I could take in city life in Rwanda and then I was able to buy a phone. Phones seem to be almost more important here than in America sometimes because that is the only way to communicate with people and since “this is Africa” people are never where they say they will be at the time they wanted to be there. Most people don’t have access to the internet so phones really become the way to get in touch with people. I’m very thankful to have a phone since apparently the internet goes down country wide out here and communication with all of you is important!

(The path up the the school)

I arrived safely in Rwamagana and visited the school Monday. Thaddy is the Chaplain at the school and Theopiste is the head mistress. They declared themselves to be my African parents while I am here and have taken such good care of me! They gave me the name Uwitonze (wit-tone-z) which means gentle and kind and the teachers gave me the name Keza (key-za) which means beautiful baby girl or young girl. So they call me Uwitonze keza Kelsey or one of those three now! They gave me a tour of the school and later made sure I was safe and comfortable at home by checking on my throughout the day Monday and Tuesday! IWE has over 400 girls and about 10 teachers. There are six grades here – senior 1 through senior 6 (that is like grades 7-12). However, there are 12 through 16 year olds in senior 1 so the age doesn’t matter of the girls. Whenever you come into the school is what counts. IWE was founded to help orphaned and poor girls who have suffered from the genocide and AIDS.  However, the younger grades consist more of girls who just want to come to IWE for an education and they do have families that live in Rwanda, Uganda or Congo. The first three years the girls learn everything and then they pick a track in senior 4. They can pick from 2 combinations to study: math, economics, and geography as one or math, physics and chemistry as another. However, the class sizes are getting bigger and bigger and there is no more room for the girls so they have the senior 5 class in the chemistry lab but soon (like next semester) there will need to be about 5 more classrooms to accommodate all the of the students and they don’t know where all of that space and money is going to come from.

(The classrooms)

The girls were so shy on the first two days and would just giggle if I tried to talk to them. The teachers were fairly shy as well. Wednesday was a huge turning point and most of the girls attempt to speak English with me now. The teachers are very eager students and ask me a lot of questions about English and how to say certain words. The President decided that the country’s new language this year would be English. It was French in the past but he wanted everyone to learn English so now all classes must be held in English.  However, the teachers do not know enough English to teach the students so they become intimidated by the language. Maja has been working with them and I speak to them a lot in between classes and at lunch. They are coming out of their shells and starting to smile and speak in English more frequently. They joke with me and tell me stories about their families and life in Rwanda.

(Me with the Senior 1B girls - ages 12-16)

Two of the teachers, Silivia and Noah, have really been a blessing to me. Silivia comes over on Tuesday mornings for English lessons and this week we really hit it off. The reason she comes on Tuesdays is because all teachers have 1 day off from classes because the school can only afford to have them for 4 out of the 5 days. So Maja and I have off and so does Siliva. She is 22 and is the French teacher at IWE. She walks us home sometimes and we have had some wonderful talks about life. Maja told me that she would not even speak English before last week and she knows a lot but is just not confident in her skills. She is improving everyday and she has even decided to teach me some Kinyarwanda, their native language. Noah overheard her teaching me and decided to start joking with me and asking me different questions in Kinyarwanda. We laughed and he told me to try harder and study every night so that we can joke in English and in Kinyarwanda. I’m trying but it is hard! I know some basic phrases and want them to teach me as much as possible since I am teaching them. Noah has had an extremely difficult life and must live away from his family because it is not safe for them to live in Rwamagana with him. However, learning English has finally given him hope again and a spark back in his life. He also walks us home at night after school since it gets dark at 6 and it is unsafe to be alone after that. He is very protective and insists that I stay with him on the roads so nothing will happen! It really is so great to have these amazing teachers at IWE who are so dedicated to their students and learning the language!

IWE’s main English teacher is Amani. He is a wonderful teacher but is still learning aspects of English as well. His big dream is to come to America to study law so that he can come back to Rwanda and create a system of laws that will benefit the country and bring their economy up. His life has also been difficult but he is a very godly man. He lives just around the corner from us so we see him quite often!

Life in Africa is quite different from what I’m used to be again, “this is Africa!” I went to Zambia for almost 2 months when I was 14 and lived the lifestyle there but this is very different. I am living in the bush here (aka the middle of nowhere with dirt roads and lights and water on a good day). The weather here is nice most off the time. It is awesome when there is a cool breeze but it gets so hot in the classrooms when there is no breeze. But overall, there is no humidity and it is in the high 70s to mid 80s every day. It is the end of the rainy season and beginning of the dry season so we still get some rain but not too much. The roads are mostly dirt in Rwamagana but are all paved or cobble stone in Kigali. Overall, the country is extremely clean and beautiful! Maja and I live in a three bedroom house that is surrounded by a gate, which everyone has in Africa. There is electricity and running water but both can go out at any time. We have to sleep with mosquito nets over our beds and tucked under the mattresses so that we don’t get eaten alive at night. We have been blessed with an amazing housekeeper, Regina. Hiring housekeepers is also normal in Africa. She comes at 7am to make us breakfast before we leave for school. During the day, she gets anything we need from the market or other stores, buys more electricity when we run out (you pay before you receive the electricity here), cleans the house, and prepares our dinner for when we return between 6 and 7 at night after school. Breakfast foods consist of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and fruit or sometimes eggs. We eat lunch at the school and that is rice and beans or maize and beans every day. Maze is corn that they dry and then ground up into this sticky mush to be honest but it is so good with their sauces. It was my favorite in Zambia! Our dinners are random foods as well but we usually have fruit salad, rice and beans or a type of pasta with veggies. Their tea here is amazing and I probably drink about eight cups a day! Regina makes a large pot of it for me and keeps it hot in a thermos for me at night.

Maja and I leave for school around 7:30 every morning and walk a half hour on dirt roads to school. When we are running late, we take motor-taxis (motorcycles) to the school and pay about 40 or 50 cents for the 3 minute ride. The school is on top of a hill that overlooks a beautiful valley and hills in the distance. The view is absolutely breathtaking and pictures don’t do it justice. Maja and I teach English classes based on the needs of the students since there isn’t a curriculum to go from really and it is hard because they don’t have enough English vocabulary to keep up with anything other than vocabulary lessons and basic aspects of conversations. We begin at 8 and teach through 12:30. We sometimes teach with the English teacher, Amani, or we teach little break out groups for those students who are struggling with the general English classes. At 12:30 we break for lunch. There is not enough room for all the girls to eat in the dining hall so they have shifts. Lunch is over around 2 and then classes continue until 4:30. We teach the teachers English after school or teach a sewing class to some of the girls. I am usually available after school to just chat with the girls and work on their English. They ask me funny questions like, “Have you ever seen with your eyes Chris Brown (the singer)?” And when I tell them I haven’t they do not understand because we are both from America. So I try to explain but then they ask what other singers I have seen with my eyes and if Justin Beiber and I are friends. I just laugh at this point and then they continue to obsess over my hair! They have never seen anything like it and are completely fascinated by it. Around 6 the girls go back into the classrooms to study their notes and review the lessons from the day so we finally take the half hour walk home if we haven’t already started to make our way home. We have long days but they are great ones. God is using me in some really amazing ways here! I am so blessed to be surrounded by so many amazing people.

(The girls in Senior 1B answering Teacher Amani's questions)

I know this was a long letter but I wanted to thoroughly inform you about my trip so far – thanks for sticking with me! And thank you all so much for your thoughts and prayers! Please, pray for IWE as they are struggling to accommodate all the students this year and teach them a new language. Also, pray for the teachers who are trying to learn English themselves so they can pour as much into the students as possible. Pray for the school as a whole as they are trying to manage all of these girls and there are more and more that come to school each term and there is no more space for anyone to sleep, eat or study. Those are my main prayer requests but if you could pray for me as I continue to teach and love these people that would be great!

I hope you all are doing well. I could not be here without all of you so thanks again for all of the support, love and prayers! 

twelve months

Here is a break down of my next year (it's a whirlwind):

1 month doing my pre-student teaching in a local Christian school...
1 month teaching English overseas in Rwanda, Africa at a women's school...
2 months of summer with my best friends and family...
4 months attending my last semester of undergraduate classes...
2 months student teaching in a local public school...
2 months student teaching in Prague at an International school...
and then I will graduate college a year early in one year and four days from today!
BAM. May 11, 2013 - I see you :)

Let's get moving friends!

finals

Finals week. Enough said. I will be back in a few days after my life settles down a bit!